Friday, April 13, 2007

Hey Slackass, where you been!

Sorry for the lack of blogness. It's been a little nutty at work, and I've been feeling like reheated dog poop, so instead of boring you with my feel-like-crappiness, I decided to keep it to myself.
But NOW, it's Friday the 13th! Which is really a secret holiday for the left handed. It's my favorite holiday, where we lefties go around playing secret tricks on your righty bitches for setting up the world in such a way that it literally kills us off about 6 years early. Ya'll think it's "bad luck."
In other news the tire dragging is coming along marvelously, but I get lots of funny looks from people who's "exercise" consists of throwing a ball for their dog for about 10 minutes. So who cares. AAAAAAAAANd since my lovely wife is on spring break this week "WOOOO SPRING BREAK!" She's going to pick me up from work and we're going to see 2 movies in a row. (300, and Blades of Glory)

Speaking of spring break.. I never went on a "typical" spring break. 3 of my 4 years in college I was so broke that I had to work as much as possible just to make rent over spring break, and the only year I didn't my rugby team went on tour through Texas and Oklahoma. We played 5 games in 7 days. We stayed with some guys who played for SMU who were smoking so much weed that you couldn't see in their apartment, and were up all night doing coke. Needless to say we kicked the crap out of them.

That's the problem with 'athletics' on American college campuses They're either unpaid professional athletes, who represent the university in name only, barely go to class and are generally a menace to their respective community, or you play a sport where you get no revenue, you have no facilities, and you have to scrape by just to find a place to stay for a road game. It's B.S. if it were up to me (and since this is my blog we're going to pretend that it is). There would be no college athletic scholarships. Student athletes would have to make grades, and would be subject to audit (ok Johnny I want to see that paper you wrote for Dr. Smith’s class. We're going to have a quiz on its subject matter) There would be a cap (and a minimum) on the amount of money that could be spent on each sport per year, and anyone caught cheating (one fudged scholarship, one kid not making grades and still playing or failing an audit, you spend $1 over the cap) would result in: 1) have a 10 year ban on NCAA competition for that ENTIRE SCHOOL and 2) Fine the equivalent of every dollar spent on that sport for 2 years (so expensive sports step out of line and the fine is much larger than if smaller sports do). Yes, the level of competition would drop, yes your favorite school would probably get flushed, but that's the price of true student-athletes. How many people's lives get ruined by coddled athletes on college campuses? Why is it the job of our institutes of higher learning to provide a minor league for the NBA, or NFL? There would be a backlash for 5 years, then things would normalize and the system would work. There would be a return to traditional collegiate and Olympic sports.

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