I'm not one to engage in slut shaming, adult women can diddle whom they want.. or dress how they like.
However, I'm pretty outraged by the privileged racist prattle that seems to coincide with this performance.
As an aside, I have no idea why her tongue kept trying to escape her head. Is that her vernacular for "sexy?" That's just weird.
Mostly what I'd like to know is why do that to announce yourself as a growd up arteest, and not this:
That is phenomenal.. that other thing? not so much.
Mahalo.
addenda: I am an old man. I was never cool. I wouldn't know cool if it hit me with a rock. So I embrace my wrongness on this subject. I own it. Still cultural appropriation: bad.
Tuesday, August 27, 2013
Monday, August 26, 2013
Catchup the second: Personal stuff. Diet, chickens, and family.
Last week we updated my work life.. which while important is pretty singular and can be summed up with a whole lot of "I work here now, and I don't do this anymore.. again."
Personal stuff is more complex. There are just a lot of moving parts.
So this is going to be completely disjointed.. Yay!
1) Babies. We had another one. At the end of March. He's awesome. Henceforth on this blog he will be known as Coco. This nickname comes from about a week after his conception. The grizzly was playing in his sandbox, I was absentmindedly looking at my phone. The grizzly without looking up from his sand, says "my sister is coming." I thought, "weird there is no way you could know that.. ok smartass here's a question." I asked him "what's your sister's name?" he (once again without looking up) "Coco."
So that's that. He's Coco, and a he not a sister but you know.. close enough.
2) Chickens.. we have them again.. and the raccoons, can still go F#ck themselves! I invested a good amount of time and some monies into fortifying the coop, then added an electric fence on top of it. We have had a couple recon missions from our friends in the genus procyon with zero success on their side and a lot of Muhahahaha on my side. Hopefully that is a trend that will continue. Hopefully in a few months we will have eggs.
3) Diet.. this is really a training thing, but that post is going to be massively gigantic as it is, so I'm putting it here. You can't stop me. I'm the boss of this blog. Ok. So for some reason when my wife is going to have a baby I get fat. 100% of the time. 2 for 2. I saw a picture of myself on the bookface that a neighbor took at the grizzly's birthday party and though "jeezus, I've gotten fat." I went to jiu jitsu a few weeks after the birth of Coco (see above) and just thought.. hmm gotten a little soggy.. Wonder what I weigh. 219.2 lbs. Oh boy.. that's too big. So an old friend was going through a protein sparing modified fast. I pondered that.. too far for me. Buuuut there are things to be learned from stuff.
I was getting tired of sucking down cold eggs from home at work and I just didn't have time to cook and consume at home. So SHAKE FOR BREAKFAST!!! So my shake contains:
Berries (some. I don't really measure)
Peaches (some.. see above)
Milled flax (2 Tsp)
Hemp Protein poweder (mostly for fiber, but for some proteins.. 3 Tsp)
Fermented Coconut milk (some.. less than 1/2 cup for probioticness)
Kale (some)
Coconut oil (1 Tsp)
This shake creates an interesting factor. If consumed as a breakfast I would be maybe ending up with a net loss of a few hundred calories. However, because it ends up taking me many hours to consume this beverage/meal I end up eating lunch somewhere about 1:30 (sometimes later) and thus I end up cutting out 2 snacks from where I was before, and thanks to my morning cup of joe I've actually ended up "accidentally" engaging in a form of intermittent fasting. I usually eat my last meal of the day at 8:30 or 9, and don't start consuming my shake till 9:30 or even later. So I've ended up with a net reduction of calories, and I'm quite comfortable I can eat this way indefinitely.
In less than 8 weeks I'm down 12 lbs. so 207, how far is far enough?
This is where physiology meets psychology. I've always had a hangup about getting under 200 lbs. I've never really admitted it aloud, but the truth of it is there is no good reason for it. I've just always been a "big guy" even though I'm not really that big 5'10" or so. I have built my self image around that, and there's no reason for it. When I was playing rugby I worked like hell to get my bodyweight up. It felt like losing ground, like taking armor off. There is no reason for me to be above 200 lbs. None. Combine this with two awesome boys that I want to see be awesome adults. The more body you have the more food you consume. The more food you consume the more oxidative stress your body has to deal with. The more oxidation the greater the instance of cancer, aging, and other stuff that kills you. Not wanting to be dead, it's time to get smaller.
So along side breakfast shake, I'm cycling my carbs a bit.
Monday: is a higher carb day
Tuesday: moderate carbs
Wednesday: low carbs
Thursday: high carbs
Friday: low carbs
Saturday: high carbs
Sunday: moderate carbs
I'm not tracking them much, but since my lunch is consistent. I just have to modulate my dinner and the food that I consume pre-training.. as follows:
High days: banana or dried fruit pre-training. starchy vegetables at dinner (sweet potato, hard squash, every once and a while potato)
Moderate days: other fruit pre-training, no starchy veg at dinner.
Low days: high protein, low to zero carbs pre-training, and no starchy veg at dinner.
Other notes:
I've really focused on changing HOW I eat. I have always eaten notoriously quickly. Taken large bites and chewed.. not much. I am actively changing that. taking bites 1/2 the size and chewing at least twice as much. This has made a significant decrease in the volume of food I take in, and has improved how I feel after meals.
I'm keeping to the code. Pretty strict paleo. No grains, legumes, and the only dairy is grassfed butter and the occasional grassfed cheese.
Weekly treats are off the menu consistently until I hit 190.
Couple re-feeds. The weekend of the 17th I had a little bit of sugar, and some extra calories. I'll put the diet on hold for a few days in September (big weekend planned.. more on that later). The difference in calories are only a few hundred, just slightly above maintenance.
The training component up next!
4) Life otherwise is good. Friends are friendly, I cook dinner and will post more pictures of that, I have been reading some books.. I have things to tell you if you.
Mahalo!
Personal stuff is more complex. There are just a lot of moving parts.
So this is going to be completely disjointed.. Yay!
1) Babies. We had another one. At the end of March. He's awesome. Henceforth on this blog he will be known as Coco. This nickname comes from about a week after his conception. The grizzly was playing in his sandbox, I was absentmindedly looking at my phone. The grizzly without looking up from his sand, says "my sister is coming." I thought, "weird there is no way you could know that.. ok smartass here's a question." I asked him "what's your sister's name?" he (once again without looking up) "Coco."
So that's that. He's Coco, and a he not a sister but you know.. close enough.
2) Chickens.. we have them again.. and the raccoons, can still go F#ck themselves! I invested a good amount of time and some monies into fortifying the coop, then added an electric fence on top of it. We have had a couple recon missions from our friends in the genus procyon with zero success on their side and a lot of Muhahahaha on my side. Hopefully that is a trend that will continue. Hopefully in a few months we will have eggs.
3) Diet.. this is really a training thing, but that post is going to be massively gigantic as it is, so I'm putting it here. You can't stop me. I'm the boss of this blog. Ok. So for some reason when my wife is going to have a baby I get fat. 100% of the time. 2 for 2. I saw a picture of myself on the bookface that a neighbor took at the grizzly's birthday party and though "jeezus, I've gotten fat." I went to jiu jitsu a few weeks after the birth of Coco (see above) and just thought.. hmm gotten a little soggy.. Wonder what I weigh. 219.2 lbs. Oh boy.. that's too big. So an old friend was going through a protein sparing modified fast. I pondered that.. too far for me. Buuuut there are things to be learned from stuff.
I was getting tired of sucking down cold eggs from home at work and I just didn't have time to cook and consume at home. So SHAKE FOR BREAKFAST!!! So my shake contains:
Berries (some. I don't really measure)
Peaches (some.. see above)
Milled flax (2 Tsp)
Hemp Protein poweder (mostly for fiber, but for some proteins.. 3 Tsp)
Fermented Coconut milk (some.. less than 1/2 cup for probioticness)
Kale (some)
Coconut oil (1 Tsp)
This shake creates an interesting factor. If consumed as a breakfast I would be maybe ending up with a net loss of a few hundred calories. However, because it ends up taking me many hours to consume this beverage/meal I end up eating lunch somewhere about 1:30 (sometimes later) and thus I end up cutting out 2 snacks from where I was before, and thanks to my morning cup of joe I've actually ended up "accidentally" engaging in a form of intermittent fasting. I usually eat my last meal of the day at 8:30 or 9, and don't start consuming my shake till 9:30 or even later. So I've ended up with a net reduction of calories, and I'm quite comfortable I can eat this way indefinitely.
In less than 8 weeks I'm down 12 lbs. so 207, how far is far enough?
This is where physiology meets psychology. I've always had a hangup about getting under 200 lbs. I've never really admitted it aloud, but the truth of it is there is no good reason for it. I've just always been a "big guy" even though I'm not really that big 5'10" or so. I have built my self image around that, and there's no reason for it. When I was playing rugby I worked like hell to get my bodyweight up. It felt like losing ground, like taking armor off. There is no reason for me to be above 200 lbs. None. Combine this with two awesome boys that I want to see be awesome adults. The more body you have the more food you consume. The more food you consume the more oxidative stress your body has to deal with. The more oxidation the greater the instance of cancer, aging, and other stuff that kills you. Not wanting to be dead, it's time to get smaller.
So along side breakfast shake, I'm cycling my carbs a bit.
Monday: is a higher carb day
Tuesday: moderate carbs
Wednesday: low carbs
Thursday: high carbs
Friday: low carbs
Saturday: high carbs
Sunday: moderate carbs
I'm not tracking them much, but since my lunch is consistent. I just have to modulate my dinner and the food that I consume pre-training.. as follows:
High days: banana or dried fruit pre-training. starchy vegetables at dinner (sweet potato, hard squash, every once and a while potato)
Moderate days: other fruit pre-training, no starchy veg at dinner.
Low days: high protein, low to zero carbs pre-training, and no starchy veg at dinner.
Other notes:
I've really focused on changing HOW I eat. I have always eaten notoriously quickly. Taken large bites and chewed.. not much. I am actively changing that. taking bites 1/2 the size and chewing at least twice as much. This has made a significant decrease in the volume of food I take in, and has improved how I feel after meals.
I'm keeping to the code. Pretty strict paleo. No grains, legumes, and the only dairy is grassfed butter and the occasional grassfed cheese.
Weekly treats are off the menu consistently until I hit 190.
Couple re-feeds. The weekend of the 17th I had a little bit of sugar, and some extra calories. I'll put the diet on hold for a few days in September (big weekend planned.. more on that later). The difference in calories are only a few hundred, just slightly above maintenance.
The training component up next!
4) Life otherwise is good. Friends are friendly, I cook dinner and will post more pictures of that, I have been reading some books.. I have things to tell you if you.
Mahalo!
Tuesday, August 20, 2013
Catchup the first: employment aka: what I learned the hard way so you don't have to.
When I last left you gentle reader, I was running my own gym based out of a Jiu-Jitsu school where I was also training and teaching. My goal with this post is not to paint anyone in a poor light, I am still friendly with most of the folks with which I entered the business. However I would be remiss if I didn't give you a rough picture of why I gave up on something (for now) that has been (and still is) a dream of mine for over a decade.
I thought I was completely up front and honest about my expectations.. however it shortly became clear that there was not a shared vision for the growth and future of the gym. My hand was forced by the birth of our second child. After his birth there was just no way for me to manage my interest in the business as closely as I was comfortable, and because the business partners and I had different ideas of how the business should be, I was uncomfortable with being more hands-off.
This discomfort combined with a pretty terrible commute left me with little choice but to leave the business. I still have all of the gym equipment in storage, and hopefully I will be able to reboot the gym on my own terms. It's a sad thing to mothball a dream. I am currently working in the data center for a major telecommunications company (coincidentally the same one my step-father worked for when I was a kid). It's boring, but it pays well. I realize that it could be well said that innumerable headstones across the western world could be embossed with "It's boring, but it pays well." I don't really have a plan. For a long time I was in near mourning over having to give up the gym. That's a major reason for the blog blackout. I just couldn't bring myself to admit that the gym was dead. Now I've accepted it, but I haven't progressed enough to start planning for a second attempt. I did however learn a ton. I am never one to keep my failings to myself, especially if they are to be learned from.. so here goes:
Things I learned.
1) Don't enter into something serious (business, marriage, attempt to summit Everest, whatever) without clearly established roles and responsibilities. No matter how agreeable your partners and peers may be, there will be disagreements. Unless there is established control (it's an ugly word I know but appropriate) things will go to hell quickly. What would be a minor disagreement, when placed a the pressure cooker will turn into anger and animosity. Anger and animosity will cause thing to go to hell.
2) Marketing. If you want people to come buy, rent, borrow, or do your thing.. you need people to know about your thing. If no one knows your name, or what you do.. they won't come.
3) Expertise means jack. I am a good coach. I have been told I am a great coach (have seen great coaches and I'm not there).. doesn't matter. The fact that I've exceeded the goals of nearly every training client I've had, and injured exactly none of them..All of my expertise, doesn't me a damn thing when I'm sitting here in this cubicle. The business failed and it failed not because I don't know how to coach. The business failed because I failed the business.
4) Ca$H rules. If you're going to open a service based business, dog walking, gym, massage, doesn't matter you need cash. 6-12 months of total expenses in your pocket AFTER you pay the start-up costs for your business. Yes you do. Expenses balloon. Things break, you find out that the seasons changing cause changing requirements. Open your business in September? well guess what, might be exceedingly cold in there come November. Did you read number 2? well that shit ain't free. Things run out, disaster strikes. You need a lot more dough than you think.
5) Start small.. No, smaller than that.. smaller. Yup about there. The bigger you start, if things go wrong (and they will to varying degrees) the more quickly those problems grow. Expanding is easy, contracting is nearly impossible. We started gigantic.
6) Know yourself/trust your instincts. I don't play well with most folks. I am cantankerous and I like to have things planned well in advance. My partners were along a spectrum of divergence from that. I was constantly uncomfortable. I repressed these alarms because I wanted so badly for this to work. I had sacrificed so much that it HAD to work.. it didn't. If I had listened to my instincts, things would would have been different for sure and more than likely better.
7) More is not better, better is better. We had 3 people working part time, and 1 person working full time, and almost nothing was accomplished after the first 2 months. A lot of things were done, but there was so much difference of opinion, so many different visions and priorities that projects would be started and abandoned almost daily. 4 wheels spinning in different directions. If we'd have created a single vision agreed on projects before they were started then things have gotten done. Maybe we'd have gone in the crapper sooner, who knows, but I doubt it.
8) Location is important, sort of. Certain businesses can overcome a crappy location. Gyms and Jiu-jitsu schools in particular, but you have to understand and mitigate the problems of your chosen location. It needs to be visible, approachable, and professional. All the marketing in the world won't matter if people can't find you, find you and are afraid, or find you to be not worth paying. Look around and see how you can deal with these issues. Admittedly this is something my partners did an excellent job of by the end, but it took too long for me to reap any benefit.
9) 90% of the people who tell you personally will patronize your business.. won't. Most of that 10% will show up for big events to "support a friend" but won't become regular customers. It's not personal, people are slaves to habit.
10) Know when to fold em. No one cares about your business but you. The free market is a cruel mistress and will grind you to a powder no matter much how good you are (or aren't). It doesn't matter how much you sacrifice to get there. Doesn't matter how badly you want your business to work. It doesn't matter how great your friends and customers tell you your service is. If your idea isn't working, you have to change. This includes shuttering the business and trying something else, somewhere else, or some other time.
Hopefully those lessons were not in vain.
Upcoming catchup posts:
Personal (diet, family, chickens)
Training (Weights, conditioning, diet, jiu-jitsu, and Judo)
Mahalo.
addendum:
The business itself is still in business as a martial arts school. Myself and the black-belt instructor are no longer involved. The gym and personal training services are no longer a part of the business.
I thought I was completely up front and honest about my expectations.. however it shortly became clear that there was not a shared vision for the growth and future of the gym. My hand was forced by the birth of our second child. After his birth there was just no way for me to manage my interest in the business as closely as I was comfortable, and because the business partners and I had different ideas of how the business should be, I was uncomfortable with being more hands-off.
This discomfort combined with a pretty terrible commute left me with little choice but to leave the business. I still have all of the gym equipment in storage, and hopefully I will be able to reboot the gym on my own terms. It's a sad thing to mothball a dream. I am currently working in the data center for a major telecommunications company (coincidentally the same one my step-father worked for when I was a kid). It's boring, but it pays well. I realize that it could be well said that innumerable headstones across the western world could be embossed with "It's boring, but it pays well." I don't really have a plan. For a long time I was in near mourning over having to give up the gym. That's a major reason for the blog blackout. I just couldn't bring myself to admit that the gym was dead. Now I've accepted it, but I haven't progressed enough to start planning for a second attempt. I did however learn a ton. I am never one to keep my failings to myself, especially if they are to be learned from.. so here goes:
Things I learned.
1) Don't enter into something serious (business, marriage, attempt to summit Everest, whatever) without clearly established roles and responsibilities. No matter how agreeable your partners and peers may be, there will be disagreements. Unless there is established control (it's an ugly word I know but appropriate) things will go to hell quickly. What would be a minor disagreement, when placed a the pressure cooker will turn into anger and animosity. Anger and animosity will cause thing to go to hell.
2) Marketing. If you want people to come buy, rent, borrow, or do your thing.. you need people to know about your thing. If no one knows your name, or what you do.. they won't come.
3) Expertise means jack. I am a good coach. I have been told I am a great coach (have seen great coaches and I'm not there).. doesn't matter. The fact that I've exceeded the goals of nearly every training client I've had, and injured exactly none of them..All of my expertise, doesn't me a damn thing when I'm sitting here in this cubicle. The business failed and it failed not because I don't know how to coach. The business failed because I failed the business.
4) Ca$H rules. If you're going to open a service based business, dog walking, gym, massage, doesn't matter you need cash. 6-12 months of total expenses in your pocket AFTER you pay the start-up costs for your business. Yes you do. Expenses balloon. Things break, you find out that the seasons changing cause changing requirements. Open your business in September? well guess what, might be exceedingly cold in there come November. Did you read number 2? well that shit ain't free. Things run out, disaster strikes. You need a lot more dough than you think.
5) Start small.. No, smaller than that.. smaller. Yup about there. The bigger you start, if things go wrong (and they will to varying degrees) the more quickly those problems grow. Expanding is easy, contracting is nearly impossible. We started gigantic.
6) Know yourself/trust your instincts. I don't play well with most folks. I am cantankerous and I like to have things planned well in advance. My partners were along a spectrum of divergence from that. I was constantly uncomfortable. I repressed these alarms because I wanted so badly for this to work. I had sacrificed so much that it HAD to work.. it didn't. If I had listened to my instincts, things would would have been different for sure and more than likely better.
7) More is not better, better is better. We had 3 people working part time, and 1 person working full time, and almost nothing was accomplished after the first 2 months. A lot of things were done, but there was so much difference of opinion, so many different visions and priorities that projects would be started and abandoned almost daily. 4 wheels spinning in different directions. If we'd have created a single vision agreed on projects before they were started then things have gotten done. Maybe we'd have gone in the crapper sooner, who knows, but I doubt it.
8) Location is important, sort of. Certain businesses can overcome a crappy location. Gyms and Jiu-jitsu schools in particular, but you have to understand and mitigate the problems of your chosen location. It needs to be visible, approachable, and professional. All the marketing in the world won't matter if people can't find you, find you and are afraid, or find you to be not worth paying. Look around and see how you can deal with these issues. Admittedly this is something my partners did an excellent job of by the end, but it took too long for me to reap any benefit.
9) 90% of the people who tell you personally will patronize your business.. won't. Most of that 10% will show up for big events to "support a friend" but won't become regular customers. It's not personal, people are slaves to habit.
10) Know when to fold em. No one cares about your business but you. The free market is a cruel mistress and will grind you to a powder no matter much how good you are (or aren't). It doesn't matter how much you sacrifice to get there. Doesn't matter how badly you want your business to work. It doesn't matter how great your friends and customers tell you your service is. If your idea isn't working, you have to change. This includes shuttering the business and trying something else, somewhere else, or some other time.
Hopefully those lessons were not in vain.
Upcoming catchup posts:
Personal (diet, family, chickens)
Training (Weights, conditioning, diet, jiu-jitsu, and Judo)
Mahalo.
addendum:
The business itself is still in business as a martial arts school. Myself and the black-belt instructor are no longer involved. The gym and personal training services are no longer a part of the business.
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